I Just Can't....Let....Go....

Control.  I say I don't want it, yet it's so hard for me to give it up.  The man is supposed to be the leader.  I don't want that responsibility.  Yet when it comes to decision making time, I want it to be mine...but I want my husband to be the one to make it.  Hmmmm....can someone say manipulation?  This is so well played out in so many examples around the Schmidt house....the resistance to the relinquishment of power...of control.  Even little every day things are hard to give up.  Take this weekend for example...

Our church did Focus on the Family's Date Night Challenge.  Part of the night was a dinner prepared by the men for their wives followed by a Cake Bake...also done by the men.  The guys had to bake and decorate a cake.  No help from their wives except a little coaching if needed.  If needed?  Of course he's gonna need it.  I had ideas in my head of what I wanted the cake to look like.  I finally asked him, "So what are you going to do?"  He already has his cake planned out.

Uh.  Okay.  I guess we'll go with it.  So we started on the journey of the cake making.  Notice I say "we."  I just couldn't stay out of it.  I found examples on the internet.  I told him how to prepare the cake for frosting.  How to color the frosting.  How to actually frost the cake.  It was so hard for me to just let him do it.  He did come up with the design all on his own, though.  Can you guess what he did?  Does anyone know my husband?

Can you see it?  It's a gun.  A Glock 19 to be exact.  It doesn't take long for my husband to get labeled "The Gun Guy" at churches we've attended.  They know him (and my boys) down at the local gun store by first name.  He works for a firearm manufacturer.  Hel-LO???  Does this surprise anyone?  So he cut the design himself...no cake pans for this guy.  He probably could have done it from memory, but....

He used a model...and I must say...it turned out pretty good!  And he is solely responsible for the design.  He thought it up and frosted it and decorated it himself.

Not bad, huh?  I know what you're thinking.  There's no way he can lose, right?  Well there are apparently some veteran cake decorators in our church.  There was this crazy cute owl complete with pineapple eyes and almond sliver feathers made by none other than our lead pastor.  Guess who won?  Scandalous, I tell you.  :)  Okay, he won fair and square, but you know what I'm thinking?  We have a year to prepare...to practice...we'll blast that owl next year!  Just kidding...sort of...  All in good fun.  :)

Either way, the point is....he did a really good job.  And it was his idea...not mine.  I helped with some of the foundation, the ground work, but in the end it was his.  Isn't this the way it's supposed to be?  The way things were designed to be?  If I just let go of a little bit of control...or the illusion of control I seem to have...I give him the room he needs to lead.  I can help him...I'm supposed to...but he has been given the responsibility of leading.  And much like with his Christmas letter this year (I'll post that just in case we missed someone...so sorry!), when I move over a little bit and give him his rightful place as leader, he does a pretty good job....a great job, actually.  Don't tell him I said so.  Just kidding about that too...sort of... :)